Blog Post #36: The Cringe Factor

Shit, we all have bad days sometimes. Days when we don’t feel like getting out of bed to face the world, days when we know we should eat healthy but have a questionable amount of sugar anyways, days when we get irritated over trivial things with people we care about, or days when we hate the way we look in the mirror. The good thing is, all that goes up must come down, and that includes the peaks of negative energy we experience sometimes. 

My friend Kara recommended a song the other day. It’s called Lipstick by Delacy. My favorite part goes “Baby steps it’s hard growing up darling/ Darling put your lipstick on and leave the apartment/ Dry those pretty eyes go out and sit in the garden”. To me, it’s a song of young adulthood. Of finding your way, making mistakes and maybe embarrassing yourself along the way, but continuing to try regardless. I think especially for young women in today’s world, the fear of failure or embarrassment can be so strong that it prevents us from even trying in the first place. Why risk it when you could stay in the shadows and play it safe?

But I think this sense of cringe is exactly what we should be chasing. Because the cringe is where the growth happens. 

Imagine you have a young daughter, who loves to sing. One day, she decides to sing for the elderly neighbors next door. Somewhere in the middle of the song, she gets flustered and misses a few words. She finishes the song but tells you she’s never going to sing for people again. What would you say to her? I’d probably tell her that mistakes happen to everyone, and that she sang beautifully. 

I use the analogy of a young daughter, but I believe this is how we should all treat ourselves. We make mistakes, we have bad days, but the point is that we tried in the first place. And as long as we’re doing something we care about, we should continue to try. 

P.S. To Kara who’s reading this, you have a beautiful singing voice. Never stop singing. I think you should sing everywhere, all the time. Because when you sing, I hear a story. And to me, that’s what music is for- speaking where words fail. 

Goodnight :)